Updated - October 4, 2021 at 15:40
Communication often begins through VK, but over time it develops into conversations on the phone, and then it’s not far from a date in real life. But to achieve this positive result, you need to be able to ask the right and timely questions.
If you have difficulty talking to a girl simply because there are no topics to talk about, then all you need to do is take the advice of more experienced social network account holders.
How to start a conversation with a girl correctly
It must be taken into account that girls do not like intrusiveness and excessive directness, which borders on vulgarity. This is especially true for the very first conversations and acquaintances. Therefore, you can start communication with a compliment.
For example, you can appreciate a girl’s beautiful smile, eyes, or praise her for the way she dresses stylishly or does her makeup. Of course, you shouldn’t tell a girl something like: “What a beautiful Greek nose you have” or similar veiled sarcastic jokes.
In some situations, flashy actions work, but they must be truly unexpected or interesting. For example, you can approach the situation with humor. Being near the metro, ask the girl you like how to get to the nearest metro.
Of course, she will laugh, pointing to the nearby buildings with a capital “M”. After this, it will be much easier to continue communication.
It must be taken into account that at the first stage of acquaintance people are very cautious towards each other and only try to find out basic information.
At this time, they most often ask standard questions about studies, hobbies, dreams, favorite pets, or what kind of pets the girl had as a child. After the first meeting, it is important to make a good impression, so communication should be built in the most correct way.
Even if people themselves have different views on life, they will still have some common points of contact that will develop into mutual interest.
Mutual friends are a great topic of conversation
The convenience of social networks is that we see a circle of mutual acquaintances and friends. Feel free to use this in correspondence!
- Oleg is your friend. Somehow he disappeared completely. How long have you heard about him?
- Do you remember Marina? She is the wife of your friend Pasha. I'm worried about them. Did you hear that they had an accident?
- ABOUT! You have Yulka as a friend, and I went to school with her. Where did you meet her?
- You studied law at the university, didn't you? Do you meet with your classmates?
- Do you work at UEMZ? I have a friend there who is a secretary, Svetlana. Do you know each other?
- You and I have the Petrovs as mutual friends. I heard they wanted to move?
- My children at school 16 studied with Svetlana Igorevna. And your?
Mutual friends and acquaintances are a great topic that you can always talk about with a guy or a man by correspondence. Discuss your friends' news, show concern if they have any problems, say hello, ask for a mutual friend's phone number if you have lost it.
How to find a topic for communication
When men talk to each other, they never have problems finding the right topic, but as soon as a pretty girl appears in the room, everyone is immediately lost and does not know what to say.
Psychology explains that this is due to a very long time when women and men were too different in social position and status. Today, these differences are almost invisible, so women can carry on any conversation, whether it concerns politics, cooking or driving.
It is best to choose a topic depending on the situation. For example, you can ask a girl where she works and, based on this, choose a topic. If she works as a pastry chef, then you should not talk to her about topics that are more close to an engineer, and vice versa.
Once you know a person’s profession and hobbies, it’s very easy to choose a topic for communication. You can ask a lawyer for advice, or ask a chef for the recipe for the most delicious dessert.
You need to understand that if a girl is also interested in communication, then she will try to support almost any topic. However, it is very important to avoid topics that may be misunderstood. Therefore, you should not start vulgar topics. Then the girl will decide that the young man is not serious and will stop any communication with him.
Topics that will bore men
Despite the large number of interesting topics, there are also some that are best avoided. They cause either negative emotions or outright boredom in men. And he won’t date a girl who doesn’t attract a guy as an interlocutor in real life.
Your girlfriends
You shouldn't talk about your favorite (or least favorite) friends. The man is not at all interested in the fact that “Masha went on a date with Petya, but she doesn’t like him very much, and she doesn’t know how to behave” or “Tanya went to the store today and bought a cool dress.” This information is unnecessary for him; in principle, he does not know who Masha and Tanya are. The guy will stop reading and responding to your messages.
Cosmetics
Please understand right away that cosmetics are not one of the topics that are interesting to talk about with a man. Firstly, he doesn’t understand this, of course, unless he works as a stylist. Secondly, for him it is a dark forest, much like for you - the tools in his drawer. Only she should know what is in a girl’s makeup bag.
Gossip
Gossip, unflattering comments about others, negativity - this is not exactly what you would like to start communication with. By discussing and judging others, passing on someone's gossip that is absolutely not supported by facts, you put yourself in a bad light. Guys are looking forward to an easy, sometimes playful, interesting and exciting conversation. Get to know each other, and don't talk about strangers.
Your problems with your ex
We always leave the past in the past and try not to return to it. The topic of exes, especially if the breakup happened recently, is quite painful and unpleasant. You should not complain about your ex-boyfriend, insult or humiliate him. The guy, seeing your attitude towards male representatives, may not want to continue the correspondence. By the way, asking a man about his past love is also wrong.
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Suitable topics
There are several topics of conversation that can be categorized depending on their mood.
Serious
Serious topics include plans for the future, as well as the moral principles of the young man. Already at the first stage of dating, a woman is always interested in how serious her potential partner is. If a man is planning only a fleeting romance, then you should not report it.
The article provides examples of topics for conversation with a girl by correspondence.
Also, the girl will be frightened by the statement that the guy plans to get married tomorrow and immediately have children. Therefore, information must be presented neutrally in order to make a good impression of yourself, but at the same time not seem intrusive.
You can talk about how a man plans to start a family someday, that for him this is an important stage in life, which he treats with due seriousness and responsibility. You also need to ask about the plans and dreams of the girl herself. Representatives of the fair sex appreciate men who show conservatism in conversation and do not cross the boundaries of what is permitted.
Merry
Many people watch comedies and happily discuss them. If the girl is not a fan of such films, then in this case you can tell some moment of your biography, which was quite mixed. But you shouldn’t remember the moments in which the man looked completely impartial. Some mildly absurd situation is enough.
For example, you can tell how you accidentally mixed up a taxi and ended up in another city. It is desirable that the story ends with some kind of conclusion. If a man knows how to admit his mistakes, then women really appreciate this. Therefore, you should not be embarrassed to say that a young man did something wrong in the past, but now he does not make such mistakes.
Cool
Topics for conversation with a girl by correspondence can be frivolous and funny. You can discuss some funny blogger or comedy show. Today the Internet is replete with various memes and other funny pictures that you can send to a girl in a message.
Examples of starting a conversation on a social network
Let's look at examples of what you can talk about with a girl on VK. First of all, you should cast the fishing rod correctly: “Hello. I saw your page in the poetry group. Got my attention. It is immediately obvious that she is smart and beautiful - in one bottle. I wanted to talk to you and get to know you better. Especially interesting, who are your favorite writers? I myself am interested in the works of Pushkin and Yesenin. A banal choice, but not Brodsky (although he is also good).”
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Such a message will immediately attract women's attention. She will definitely read it. However, you should not repeat it word for word. Not all girls are interested in poems. You need to understand the basic rule - you can captivate a beauty with the help of a topic that is close to her.
It is worth studying some correspondence with girls on VK. Example of unsuccessful communication:
- P.: Hello. How are you?
- D.: Hello. Fine.
- P.: I see.
The dialogue is wrong. First of all, a banal start. Many young ladies leave such messages unanswered, especially if they are popular with the opposite sex. Secondly, the guy immediately stopped writing. He did not try to take the conversation in a different direction, to get to know his interlocutor better. You can't expect a woman to make the first move. You need to be persistent, but not overuse it. Perhaps today the interlocutor had a tragedy and has no desire to communicate with strangers.
Here are examples of how to correspond with a girl correctly. Example 1:
- P.: Hello. I see that everything is wonderful in life.
- D.: Why did you decide that?
- P: A beauty with such a beautiful smile cannot have any difficulties. All doors are open for her.
- D: Good to hear. But everyone has problems.
- P.: I hope that everything is fine in life anyway. The weather is beautiful outside. The sun melted the snow. The cold is receding. No one says the phrase: “Winter is coming.” She left for a long time. The rains will end soon and you can swim in the warmth.
- D.: I see that your interlocutor is a real romantic.
- P: Of course. I learned from articles about how to properly communicate with a girl online.
- D.: Funny. Everything is really good with a sense of humor.
The guy caught the attention of his interlocutor with his complimentary eyeliner. Such “hooks” should be used regularly during a conversation. They draw you into a romantic web and put you in the right mood. This is a good example of how to communicate with a girl on VK and make her like you.
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There are other examples of how to start a conversation with a girl on social networks. Example 2:
- P.: Good afternoon.
- D.: It’s not a fact that he is so kind.
- P: I wonder why? I always thought that beautiful people have much fewer problems. I don’t experience any difficulties in life at all.
- D.: There are no problems with a sense of self-importance. I approve. And it’s difficult because it’s Monday. Hard day.
- P.: Are everyday working hours stressful? I try to enjoy everyday days. I only pay attention to the positive aspects. Life is much more pleasant, especially if the salary at work is good.
The guy uses several “hooks” at once in a conversation. He is interested in the life of a new acquaintance and talks about himself, at the same time making her curious, thereby fueling her interest in communication.
If there's nothing left to talk about
Sometimes there are moments when it seems that all the topics have already been discussed so many times. There's nothing more to talk about. In this case, you can use win-win topics that will always be relevant.
First of all, you can talk about what happened during the day, ask the girl what’s new with her. It is worth discussing the weather or the situation in the country. You can also create some kind of fantasy together. For example, you can ask a girl to think about what would happen if people learned to fly, what the world would look like today.
You can come up with a variety of situations. Consider an example of a film and ask how she assesses the possibility of such a plot in reality. Such topics are addictive, they are very interesting, fun and allow people to open up.
Question options
I bring to your attention examples of what you can ask a guy about when communicating on VK.
- I have long dreamed of mastering cycling. Can you? Is it difficult?
- Have you been to Europe?
- I love rock. What kind of music do you prefer?
- What attracts you most about basketball?
- Tell us about your most unusual birthday gift.
- How long have you been involved in sports running?
- Do you like horror films?
- Have you tried sushi?
- I drink tea with milk. Which one do you prefer?
- Which New Year is most etched in your memory? What exactly happened then?
What to talk about with a girl?
It all depends on the conditions under which communication occurs. As a rule, at first conversations are conducted over the phone or on social networks.
By phone
When talking on the phone, you should not talk too loudly or, conversely, quietly. The timbre should be pleasant, since everyone knows that any person likes to listen to beautiful voices. When talking on the phone, you can also praise the girl’s pleasant voice and then continue the conversation. The topics of conversation can be very different.
However, when talking on the phone, you need to be careful, since if there is a pause, severe awkwardness will appear and it will be more difficult to continue the conversation. Therefore, before dialing a girl’s phone number, it is better to immediately prepare several main topics and additional topics in case there is a pause.
On the Internet, on VKontakte
Topics for conversation with a girl by correspondence should also be selected carefully so as not to cause unpleasant emotions in the interlocutor. The Internet is convenient because, if necessary, you can supplement your speech with some visual material, for example, send a link to an image or video.
If communication is conducted through social networks, then you can ask where this or that photo was taken. The girl will be happy to tell you exactly where she took the photo and perhaps add interesting facts to the story.
If not, you can ask about it. For example, in the photo she stands against the background of the Eiffel Tower. This is an excellent reason to ask how she liked it in France, what attracted her to this country more, what kind of French people are and many other questions that will allow you to maintain a full-fledged conversation.
The social network makes it much easier to communicate, since modern instant messengers are filled with emoticons, pictures showing emotions, postcards, and stickers. They allow you to make communication more relaxed and more accurately convey the emotions that people experience at the moment of communication.
It would be a good idea to study the information provided by the girl in her profile. Based on the data obtained, you can find many topics for conversation.
Example of information in a VK profile | What conversation topic to choose |
In the photo there is a girl with a cat in her arms. | Cats, animals. You can ask for advice on choosing the right cat. Clarify the characteristics of the girl’s pet breed. You can also talk about animal welfare organizations. Suggest an interesting film with animals or funny videos from the Simon's Cat series. |
Rock music is listed in the Interests section. | If the style of music matches the one the young man listens to, then you can send a message in the form of an audio recording and ask the interlocutor’s opinion about this or that group. Tell us about your experience of going to a music concert. Ask about the biographies of the group members and so on. |
Yoga is listed as a hobby. | We can honestly admit that the guy has never done yoga, but he would be interested in learning more about this area. |
In any case, you need to make the most of all the information, and also the photographs are provided in the account of the girl herself. In fact, each user himself provides topics that he would be interested in talking about. Therefore, it is worth paying attention to this.
But if another fan is actively writing to a girl on the “wall” in VK, then you should not focus on him. Moreover, you should not ask a girl who she is and show signs of jealousy. This will only push you away at first.
If you really want to find out who a potential competitor is, you can do it in a humorous way. For example, “Well, I’m just about to get married, and they take me away right from under my nose.” It is important that the humor is understandable, and not offensive and does not look like a sign of weakness.
Best topics to talk about
You need to communicate with a girl on VK in such a way that she is interested. It is necessary to capture her attention, make her talk without tension and excitement:
- The ideal option for what to talk about with a beautiful girl on VKontakte would be hobbies and interests. You can recognize them unobtrusively by studying the page of your interlocutor.
- Music, cinema and literature are worth discussing. Often women indicate their favorite works on the page. These are the things you can talk about with the girl you like on VK. Similar dialogues continue for hours. The layer of contemporary art cannot be discussed in a couple of days. If you have a good tongue, then you can talk about creativity all day long.
- A guy must be interested in a woman's life. This is done carefully, as in a hunt, where the main rule is not to spook.
- Girls are interested in photography. Invite her to a photo shoot - the perfect setting for a first date.
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You can also communicate with a girl on neutral topics:
- World News. A lot of events happen around a person. It is enough to talk about something interesting and ask for an opinion on the issue. A convenient way to find what to talk about with a smart girl on VK.
- Food. Instagram is filled with product photos. According to statistics, every third girl posts them, so we can safely condemn taste preferences. The information will help you choose a restaurant for your first meeting offline.
- Friends and relatives. This is a slippery topic and should be raised carefully. Some people have problems on the personal front. It’s better to casually talk about your friends and see their reaction.
- Pets. Girls love cats and dogs. Many people start them at home. Animals are a good option for a long conversation. If you have a pet, you need to find out about its life. The young lady will happily talk about the difficulties of “upbringing”.
- Sport. A healthy lifestyle is the main trend of the 21st century. Representatives of the fair sex are especially fond of sports. Give your friend the opportunity to speak out about the difficulties of being active. Women like to be listened to and pitied.
- Adventures. You can always discuss distant countries and travel. Young people don't know how to sit still. It is not surprising that many people talk to a girl on VK about desires and dreams.
On the first date
It is more difficult to choose topics for conversation with a girl on the first date than when communicating by correspondence. But on the other hand, this is a great opportunity to establish visual contact, which is also important in the early stages of communication. On the first date, you need to diversify your conversations as much as possible. Just don’t joke or, conversely, be too serious.
It is recommended to build communication according to the following algorithm:
- First of all, you need to praise the girl’s appearance, give flowers or make a pleasant compliment. With flowers and gifts, it is better to act depending on where the date will take place. For example, if you give a girl a huge bouquet of roses and a large teddy bear, and then ask her to go to the cinema and take a walk in the park, then she will feel uncomfortable constantly holding flowers and toys in her hands.
- After this, so that no one feels tense, you can start the conversation with some funny story or anecdote from life.
- Next, you should gradually move on to professional employment. At this stage, you can talk about your work, ask about what the girl does, what she did before. Does she like her job?
- After this, you can again move on to a more detached topic and talk about hobbies. For example, how exactly the girl spends her free time, what hobbies she has. Perhaps she is playing some kind of sport or studying some interesting literature.
- After this topic, you can move on to the topic of loved ones. It is worth finding out about her family and friends.
- At the final stage of the conversation, it is worth discussing future plans. Clarify what goals the girl sets for herself and be sure to tell her about hers.
What interests men
Representatives of the stronger sex love to talk about purely masculine topics, for example, about women, sports, computers, sex. Those who have served or those who are about to serve often raise the topic of the army and the armed forces in conversations. But these are things that they discuss with their friends and colleagues. Young people will be happy to discuss their hobbies, interesting events in the world or in the city, travel, and work with girls.
If you don’t know what topics to talk about with a guy on VK that you like, then determine the direction of the conversation. To do this, study his profile. If the man is not too secretive, and the page is not fake, then you can get an idea about his interests and family, and understand whether he has a girlfriend. To do this, look at his groups, photos, music, posts on the page. Lots of photos from the gym? Start with the topic of sports. Are there a lot of audio recordings and new ones are constantly being added? Bring up the topic of your favorite music.
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How to build a dialogue correctly?
In order to prevent pauses from occurring, you need to immediately prepare several spare topics for communication. Even if they run out, you can always get out of it by telling an interesting scientific fact.
For example, if a young man is sitting in a cafe with a girl, drinking coffee and there is a pause, then you can say that in fact the inventor of sugar packets did not intend that they would be torn, he wanted them to be broken in half. When he found out that his invention was never used as it should be, he could not come to terms with it and left this world.
This is an interesting fact that makes an impression. A topic for conversation appears. You might suggest trying to break the sugar packets as the inventor intended, to honor his memory. Such a topic not only allows you to fill the pause, but also demonstrates how comprehensively developed the young man is.
It is important to constantly maintain a conversation and not allow too long monologues on the part of a man.
The girl also wants to know something about a potential partner. You need to talk about yourself, but not for too long, so that your interlocutor doesn’t get bored. Under no circumstances should you interrupt the girl or show disrespect for what she says. Therefore, you shouldn’t take out your phone and put it on the table at all.
Good manners: rules of communication by correspondence
Let's start with a situation where a man wrote first. For example, mutual friends told him about you, you met because of common interests, or he just saw your cute avatar.
You received a message “Hello” or a young man made a comment on your post. What's next?
Start a light conversation. The first thing a girl needs to remember is that she is one of the many men you will talk to online. Your response to his appeal does not oblige you to anything.
If you and your interlocutor are over 30 years old, then it is better to continue communication on “you”. After some time you will be able to switch to “you”, but not right away. If you are responding to a public comment, it is better to also respond to “you”.
You wrote “Hello” or replied to a comment. What should you talk about next with your guy if he wrote to you, for example, on VK? You shouldn’t bombard your new acquaintance with questions like “What are you interested in?”, “Why are you writing to me?”, “What did you want?”, “Who are you?”, “Do we know each other?” Remember - this is an easy communication that you have the right to interrupt at any time. But you can create a “bridge” to further conversation.
Correspondence:
- Hello. - Hello! - What do you do? - I am drinking coffee. There is no sun, without coffee the battery is low. How are you feeling?
Comment under the photo:
- A nice place! - Absolutely a delight! Were here?
After this, a dialogue can begin. If it doesn’t start, don’t worry, you won’t even remember in 10 minutes.
If the conversation continues and you are interested in communicating further, then you should not chaotically jump from topic to topic, asking random questions.
It is better to develop the conversation consistently. There are several simple techniques for corresponding on VK with a guy or man:
- Reception "Three pluses". You were asked a question. In your answer you write: emotion + condition + fact. For example: “Do you like coffee?” - “I can’t live without him. Especially on a day like today. Got wet in the rain." Or: “Do you like coffee?” - “Oh, I’m a coffee lover! Especially if the coffee is good. It’s a pity, I can’t find my favorite variety.” You demonstrate to the man your desire to continue communication, but do not overwhelm him with questions. But after a couple of phrases you can ask: “Do you like coffee or tea?”
- Edge effect. A man tells you something. In response, you express your opinion + formulate a question from the last words of his statement.
- No, I don't like coffee. I prefer green tea.
I find it too tart. Does green tea need to be brewed properly?
- Yes, I don’t worry, I just buy it in bags.
- Well that's right! What good green tea bags can you recommend?
- Reception “Three “YES”. Look at the latest events or photos on the guy's or man's page. Start a conversation on facts that are already obvious to you. For example: “You have such a cool photo with kebab! It seems to me that it’s on an embankment somewhere.” - "Yes". - “There seemed to be a barbecue festival there?” - “Yes, this Sunday!” - “Was there a lot of people?” - "Yes".
Using this technique, you will not think about what else you can talk about and what to ask the guy in correspondence.
The secret is that after answering positively 2-3 times, the guy relaxes, has a positive attitude and feels more confident in the conversation. It is often not so easy for men to maintain communication; women are more prone to the “conversational genre”. Sometimes you can help a guy a little to move forward in communication.
You don't need more than three yeses. Take a break. You have already “suggested” a topic to the man - what to talk about. If he is interested in the conversation, he will continue. Even if he is not a “master of communication,” you gave him a reason to send more photos or videos, to say something about the event. If not: you “clarified” what you “wanted” and left the conversation without losing your dignity.
How interesting is it to tell about yourself?
Topics for conversation with a girl by correspondence are not the only thing that needs to be prepared in advance. It is also recommended to decide before the date what the man will talk about himself, because such a question is guaranteed to arise. Therefore, it is better to write an interesting story in advance. Don't embellish yourself or lie.
Girls see lies very well, so there is a risk that she will be disappointed and decide that in front of her is a frivolous young man who is making up lies about himself just to show off. You need to be extremely honest, but not tell inconvenient facts about yourself that can be classified as a fiasco or shame.
The story about yourself should also be dynamic and different. Therefore, you should not delve too deeply into some dramatic events or, conversely, talk about things that may cause disgust. You can talk about your parents, childhood, school years.
It is advisable to cover every period of life, but not focus too much on it. The more people learn about the other person's life, the faster they begin to feel comfortable in his presence.
It’s worth talking about ex-girlfriends only if the interlocutor asks about it herself. In the main story, it is better to omit the topic of relationships. Not everyone likes to hear about other people, especially if the fair sex also feels sympathy for the man. In this situation, a feeling of jealousy may automatically arise, and then the overall mood of the evening will be ruined.
Common Mistakes
Many people make a number of mistakes that can lead to a sad end to the dialogue, a reluctance to continue communication, or even blocking from the interlocutor.
Remember the main mistakes and don’t make them:
- Blatant ignorance. You are not required to write flawlessly, but you should not make basic mistakes. Your literacy is what your pen pal sees first when you communicate online. It is imperative to follow the rules of the Russian language. What will happen if you start texting in this style: “Explain why my son got a D in Russian?” Funny? Your illiteracy is from the same series.
- “Bombardment” with messages. There is no need to ask 10 questions per minute without waiting for an answer to the previous one. Give the person time to answer one question and then ask the next one.
- Using other people's phrases and poems. Such expressions are suitable for dialogue with a girl, but in measured quantities. Answering all your interlocutor’s questions with the words of great poets is clearly overkill.
- Inconsistency with communication style. Correspondence with unfamiliar girls should be conducted in ordinary language, without using youth slang or working terms. She may simply not understand these expressions.
- Excessive use of emoticons. Not only the fair sex, but also some guys are guilty of this. A couple of emoticons will be useful, but 5 emoticons in a row, placed at the end of each sentence, makes the text difficult to understand.
- Write at any time of the day. Choose day or evening for communication; late evening is only suitable if your chosen one is online. Even if you have something to talk about with a girl right now, but she is not online, then postpone the message until the morning. Imagine that tomorrow she has an important day, and you wake her up in the middle of the night! What emotions will she begin to experience towards you? That's right, negative.
- Don't be yourself. You should not impersonate another person. Don’t pretend to be rich and successful if you work as a simple manager in an ordinary company. When meeting a girl online, the lie will be exposed. This will most likely end the conversation.
It is important not only to be able to start a conversation, but also to continue it correctly. If your interlocutor doesn’t like your style of communication, she can easily block you, then you won’t have the opportunity to get to know her. Social networks are good because you can write to the woman you like without hesitation and start communicating with her. But at the same time, it is important to know effective ways to communicate in order to interest her and get her consent for a first date.
Questions to ask
Questions can relate to relationships or any other topic. For example, you can ask a girl what she considers the best way to make peace with her partner. You can also ask her where she would prefer to relax: in the wild or on a beautiful beach with a cocktail in her hands.
If communication becomes more serious, which involves the development of a relationship, you can ask what relationships mean to her and how she generally feels about love. You can find out whether a girl likes family holidays and how many children she would like to have.
There are many interesting questions in this topic. For example, would she like to live in her own house or apartment. After this, you can find out why she chose this or that option.
The topic of astrology may be interesting. You can ask a girl how she feels about horoscopes. Many people today are interested in these areas. Therefore, if a girl starts talking about how she believes in zodiac signs and their correspondence, then in this case there is no point in arguing, even if the man’s position is different.
On the contrary, it is worth developing the topic more and inviting the interlocutor to evaluate the correspondence of her zodiac signs. It can turn out to be a very interesting and at the same time funny conversation. Well, if a girl says that she doesn’t believe in such things, then it is not recommended to dwell on this topic.
You can also ask some unusual question. For example, what wish would a girl make if it could come true right this second? Another interesting question is whether the girl associates herself with any flower or animal. This is a very unusual and interesting topic that allows you not only to get rid of pauses in conversations, but also diversifies the conversation.
You can ask a girl how she fell in love for the first time. Despite the fact that we are talking about another man, a woman is always pleased to remember those positive emotions. At the same time, she will project them onto the person she is talking to at the moment.
You can clarify whether the girl believes in aliens, ancient civilizations and other things. If she loves to read, then you should definitely ask for advice in choosing a book. The main thing is that the topics of conversation change their color. Nobody likes to communicate with pessimists or people who constantly smile for no reason.
When choosing topics for conversation with a girl on a first date, by correspondence or under other circumstances, it is always tedious to take into account the character traits of the interlocutor. At first, it is difficult to understand what a person likes and what annoys him.
Don't be embarrassed to ask about this. The more honest the conversation, the faster the girl will understand that this is a serious and decent man with whom she can talk about anything.
Advice from psychologists
Psychologists advise keeping communication as casual as possible. Often people on the Internet create an image that does not correspond to reality. Because of this, after a date, communication stops. A person must remain himself. You cannot try on other people's masks. You need to conquer a girl with your own qualities, and not someone else’s.
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Communication with a friend on VKontakte can last a long time. It is important to learn how to talk with any interlocutor. There is no universal formula for success. Only by getting to know different girls can you understand what to talk to them about.
If you are antisocial and don’t know how to communicate, then it’s time to loosen up. Start with dialogues with family and friends. You will soon become a skilled conversationalist.
Conversations on social networks can liberate a person and make him brighter. It’s easy to figure out what to talk about with a girl in contact. You can have a conversation about anything.
Personal questions
The list of questions that are not suitable for conversation with your interlocutor includes conversations on an intimate topic. You should not ask a young man about his family, ex-wife and children, sexual experience, or health. Avoid questions that may affect troubles that are occurring or have once occurred in a person’s life. You are neither a close friend nor a relative for him to open his soul to you and tell you about his secret things.
For further communication, when your relationship moves into real life and you become more or less close people, save other personal topics. You shouldn’t burden your man with stories about your sick granny, even if you love her very much, your deceased uncle, or your fear of death. Such revelations bear little resemblance to easy, exciting and pleasant communication.
Avoid heavy and overly serious topics related to violence, wars, and disasters. You should not talk about this with a stranger, especially if you do not know his attitude to the situation. He may take such topics personally or not attach any importance to them at all. In addition, this topic is quite controversial.
The main mistakes when correspondence
Now you know how to build a dialogue on social networks, because the examples have just been clearly shown. But choosing topics is not so important as presenting information correctly and not going overboard.
If you are aiming for a long and productive conversation, then do not make mistakes:
- Don't criticize the guy himself, his hobbies, opinions, or favorite actor, even if the criticism is constructive.
- Do not judge other people and their actions, especially if the information is presented in a negative way. When you really want to discuss someone’s action, just tell them what you would do in a particular case.
- Do not impose your opinion while talking with a guy on a social network. It's better not to argue. Let everyone remain to their own opinion.
- Do not lie. Over time, you will forget about lying and you can give yourself away by mixing up something in your story.
- Don't agree on everything. If you communicate with a guy on VKontakte more actively than in real life, don’t be afraid to express your opinion. For example, a man likes to hunt, but are you against killing? So tell him.
- Don't be nosy. It's hard to communicate with a person who pokes his nose into someone else's life.
- Do not flatter. Sincerely admire actions or deeds only if you consider them correct.
These are the most common mistakes that a girl makes in correspondence. Such mistakes can serve as an obstacle to further communication, because the guy will stop continuing the dialogue.
What can't you do?
If a girl has accepted a friendship invitation, then there is no need to wait for her to write herself. And if she writes first, think about it, because it’s not for nothing that good girls don’t take the first step. At the same time, the first message should not be intrusive. There is no need to start with the phrases “Do you have a boyfriend?” or “Let’s get to know each other.” It's better to let it be a simple "Hello." After all, first you need to show respect to your interlocutor - at least say hello. If the girl answers, it means she is ready to communicate.
How to move from topic to topic
It's good if you know how to have an easy and lively conversation. In this matter, choosing an interesting topic for conversation is important. Ways to translate the topic:
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- Smoothly move away from the original topic. For example, a guy’s story is about skydiving: find out how he feels when a plane takes off, is he scared if he takes off not to jump, but to get from one city to another, and then start a conversation about travel.
- Insert a suitable joke or tell a funny story. We're talking about a guy's dog and you're already a little fed up with it? Distract your interlocutor with the phrase: “By the way, I remembered a funny joke on this topic.” Even if you don’t know any fascinating stories, you can always look up the funniest cases on the Internet. Then change the topic to something else so that the guy can't return to it.
- If you want to continue a sincere conversation on the Internet, but the topic on which you are communicating has reached a dead end, start asking the guy questions. With their help, move away from the conversation and develop the next topic on which you can also communicate.
- If you notice that your interlocutor is bored, you can directly suggest changing the topic. Show care - this will evoke positive emotions.
These methods are great for changing the conversation and directing it in a new direction. You just need to know how to use them correctly.
Topics for conversation with a girl on VK
I don’t recommend delaying communication on VK. Try to get the girl’s phone number as quickly as possible and call her, agree to meet in real life. In VK it is quite difficult to maintain a conversation at the desired level, and it is pointless. If a girl doesn't give her number and breaks down, forget about her and move on to someone else.